Falling Together

As a psychotherapist, I’m tasked with helping my clients deal with change. I thought it would be a good idea to provide you with a few thoughts on the subject. My goal is to encourage you to think about your attitude and ideas about the subject. I also want to make you aware of how I can help you when you either want to change something or when you have to face some change that has been thrust upon you. It is important to consider this subject not only because change is inevitable but also because change represents one of the most stressful occurrences in your life. A good psychotherapist can help you see how your life may be falling together when it appears to be falling apart.

How do we change? Smoking cessation researchers Prochaska and DiClemente theorized that people change in stages. Their States of Change Model describes, pre-contemplation, contemplation, action, and maintenance as the stages we pass through on the way to no longer smoking. Dr. Allan Schore posits that the brain grows from organization to disorganization to organization on a higher level. Recovering drug addicts believe, a relapse can bring about a more rigorous application of recovery principals. Life is up and down like a sound wave which turns down after reaching its peak.

Change is hard and transitions can be stressful. Even though it is inevitable and you still have to cope with it throughout your lifetime. None of us are very good at it consistently. For any number of reasons, your life can become disorganized without your permission. You can find yourself experiencing a great deal of stress through no fault of your own or anyone else’s for that matter. Things just change. The stress of it can throw you off balance and make you feel awful. Stress can make you stupid. It makes you forget to remember that change is constant, that you have been surviving change your entire life, and that figuring out who’s at fault is not as important as making adjustments and coping with it. The stress comes from suddenly having to let go of what you know and embrace the unknown.

One thing that helps is having someone to talk to who has experience navigating the change process. Someone who can identify where you are and who can predict what to expect can be most helpful. That support could be the difference between being able to persevere by conserving energy, money, and avoiding bad decisions. A good psychotherapist can help you during turbulent times. I can help you identify your strengths, refocus your thoughts, and sooth your frayed nerves. That is what good professional psychotherapy is all about. What value would you place on my helping you forecast what to expect and how to prepare for it?